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"haven't i heard this before? your moves are straight out of the book and you're playing by numbers. what could this possibly be challenging? this is so '81, this is so '88, this is so '95... this is so insincere."
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finally. [12 May 2006|08:31pm]
8   ///FUCK IT

spring break '06! sxsw [20 Mar 2006|02:15pm]
for sxsw i got to see elijah wood jogging, make the "the guy from nada surf" play "popular" during an instore, have the great redneck hope eat all my ice pops as usual & driving on railroad tracks with lindsay arnold's dumbass. i put a show on with akimbo/gospel/funeral diner/racebannon/dmonstrations & it went over well. i guess funeral diner stole sparks from the vice kills texas party & we're going to drink them tuesday in their memory. this entry isn't funny. at all. but i named alot of bands...

"all i know is a band from GSL is playing."
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acl was nuts shit man! [28 Sep 2005|11:31am]
stop stealing my records kids! i went to that dumb trail of dead adultswim thing & almost killed the kids splashing water on my glasses. KILLED. then everything in my life went back to people being heroin addicts/shittyasfuck. shoot it up the viens in your eyeballs next time,please. i got paid to watch alot of good bands at acl, 14 hour days. i guarded the VIP box at the cingular stage. sorry rita didn't give you all better writing material and excuses to throw "benefits." what! my sister told me to type it.

oasis refusing to play, me being drunk on the job & moreCollapse )
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before you read this make sure to not be a stuck up prick please. [21 Sep 2005|09:41pm]

update: yeah i really want lives destroyed, i was definately being completely serious - no sarcasm at all.
26   ///FUCK IT

plan to arrive on 9/11 [04 Sep 2005|11:47am]
damnit, summer's over. what a bummer. not. why'd everyone still wait 'till the weekend for parties? now that summer is over i guess nothing will change. sweeeeeeet. i threw natalie aston a going away party. "threw" meaning everyone else said there was a party here. im doing security at austin city limits festival so if you want in for free pretend to be my friend. my friend is coming in who knows when probably never. im throwing him a party. suck-dick.shtml.

i hate you allCollapse )
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you can tell wells fargo it's fraud even if it's not and get your money back. [12 Aug 2005|03:29pm]
i wonder what they point is of talking to people who won't remember having talked to you because they were so drunk. gay john came to town, with weed. then kim&kim came. if you know what i mean. i can't go to philly when i wanted to 'cos of the apd. great,thanks. at least i'm tough (because i said i was on myspace, not because i actually am.) i'm also popular. you can tell because when i leave comments i'm sure to mention how fuuuun it was hanging out with them. which proves we're real friends. duh. god, partying every weekend & going nowhere in life is soooo cool. rule#1 of next weekend is don't walk with a drunk alex. goal#1 is wake up on the east side on a mexican's couch while he cums on your face & you can't remember how you got there. what shouldn't happen again that happened last night? listen to a thumbscrew member call "poopie" all night. also, having almost literally everyone i worked with at alamo drafthouse be there. 123go!

i bet peter jennings met up with jfk.
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get me out of austin!! phillllyyy. [23 Jul 2005|06:01pm]
it smells like 666 in here.aaahhhhhhhhaa. fuck.

my real birthday was spent waking up to ron&timmy yelling about getting high,stuff that's boring,beer at emos, & feeling out of it. im not capable of an intelligent conversation. i wish people would shut up sometimes. why must you end your sentences with "you know?" to make sure im paying attention. i dont know, & im not paying attention. people give me anxiety attacks. i need... to marry neal from rock star: inxs. MTV called about blacken party crew and they might get their own tv show unless adam fucked it up. i had a dream donald trump kissed me.
22   ///FUCK IT

lola is always better when you're high. [07 Jul 2005|06:13pm]
birthday bust! good thing it's really on the 11th so you guys all get a second chance to not fuck it up this time. if you want that explained to you you'll have to buy me britney spears' perfume. i did, however, get half a xanax from scott & a shake from travis. and a really ugly bracelet, that i yelled at all day on july 5th because it wouldn't come off my arm, from jo. and devon's little sister made me wear her crown. weird. and colt promised me a present but i dont think 78-WOODY is his number anymore. on the 6th 'the crowd' came to stay & i guess they've never seen turtles as big as the average size turtle..hm. funny story,kinda long. ask me. i also got a song dedicated to me. first time since machine gun romantics wrote one about me!

chandlier fucked my nose up! but i did get a kiss that made me feel like i was on elimidate.
6   ///FUCK IT

tell me to have a birthday party! [29 Jun 2005|07:55pm]
since moving lola has jumped onto the roof, i've lock myself in the bedroom because the doorknob fell off, lola & i have chased roaches & i've eaten nothing but corn dogs & toaster strudels because bananas go brown in the fridge, the watermelon froze, and i got the dark purple grapes on accident - which are nasty if you didn't know. the only people who have called me since getting a phone are jo, patfuck, & time warner. which is ok because i hate going out again. i miss justin harvey. but my other best friend from high school is moving to san antonio! and i'm predicting no one will know it's my birthday next monday. .

oh! my mom works in the ER and the real world austin cast came in .. dundundunCollapse )
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haha lj is the old myspace. [16 Jun 2005|12:26am]
the last few days i stayed at my mothers i woke up to a 6-pack of budlight in the fridge. & every morning i drank all 6 of them. i've been painting my new place and hoping for company - only jamie has expressed interest. i guess never mind on your welcome back party ron! 'cos natalie leaves on trips too much. i'moving to PA as soon as geoff and angie tell me it's a-ok. alright!??? ok thanks. i hate my life/cool.

pictures with adam/people i hate,etc.Collapse )
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i know it's pretty honey, but i didn't bring it out for air. [25 Apr 2005|02:40pm]
"someone" cut chunks of brandon's hair off when he was sleeping, & shaved circles into it. he was the only one who slept through all of it so i made him wake up & he told me i had stupid hair. how ironic. cleo pretty much ruined my life for a few days. right after scott saved it. but being mean has never gotten me more popular. except with keith.

ps. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed!
6   ///FUCK IT

punching people is SO COOL [10 Apr 2005|06:20pm]
fuck houston. at johana/bryan jaksin's bday party i punched two guys in the face. one of them was colby jordan. they both bled. i had this candy watch and asked everyone if they needed to know what time it was. it was always 4:20 btw. bryan loved that joke. --lindsay arnold saved my life. but basically, it's just good to know that houston is filled with "cokeheads" too.
9   ///FUCK IT

"im riding the wave of dehydration" - ebgIII [21 Mar 2005|06:32am]
sxsw is not what it was last year. but an albatross stayed over & we drank beers & watched elimidate & golden girls. and boy do they get really into those. lola shook her head "no" to eddie and he went wild about that. shes real smart. there are cowboy boots everywhere. as well as ebgIII's monk necklace that broke. i like that girls flirt with him alot & giggle, it's real weird. i dont even think they know his name though. GEL-EVER. the flaming lips came into work & im drunk.

see ya next year!Collapse )
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i love keith mckinney, literally. [06 Mar 2005|11:17pm]
the new thing with dumb girls is pretending they hate girls. ha! its not a trend. you know you're dumb flirts who cant get your online bf's to hang out with you unless there is alcohol involved. get off myspaceeeeee. the more comments you get the more popular you are in real life! my real life friends ditch me & no one replies to my entries so maybe i should get a myspace.

so im gonna drink a 40 on my front steps as usual. put the spice girls in. ive got this neat raincoat and man is it pouring!

4   ///FUCK IT

an entry about homosexuality [21 Feb 2005|05:33pm]
my mom had me tell keith we were at a rave because we were out
together at about, let's say..4am. then two transvestites in a
convertible had us follow them around downtown houston.

i got a job at the alamo drafthouse.
3   ///FUCK IT

two faced? weird [14 Feb 2005|12:42am]
keith isnt gonna be here for valentine's day so i think i'll get us the french room at the pearl st bed & breakfast when he gets back. but only so i can finally take a bubble bath again. and since ive been going through all my jean pockets finding old tip money i think i can just about afford it.

also im a cokehead and have about 3 eightballs here all the time & i "make" everyone else cokeheads too. wtf!?!? reason #78654379 why im watching a movie tonight instead of going to a party two streets over so i can listen to kids tattle on each other. sickos. ill sit on my stoop with lola & watch girls walking down the street falling over drunk drinking a bottle of whineeee.

also i think gogoogi and brandon are the same person, but who knows.
43   ///FUCK IT

i don't think alot of people know what "rsvp" means. [23 Jan 2005|11:58am]
regardless, jaime brought me a house warming gift & cleo fits in now. there was this really great point where ronnie came back with literally half a pound of weed. weeeeeird. i had to call an emergency to the city of austin becuase i had no electricity. i ordered a pizza from my sidewalk and joanna scared off all the frat kids by being reallly loud as usual, then rusty kidnapped fay and ran into a tree. im glad adam helped me move in. (not) and im renaming it from "my house warming party" to "the night everyone lost respect for rusty party." and fay a little bit too, but look who's talking. speaking of, big thanks to keith for two nights in a row of 8 baggies that literally everyone loved. except rusty of course.

dont ask jaime who she used to date, she just doesnt want to talk about it.
11   ///FUCK IT

[09 Jan 2005|07:54pm]
the great redneck hope came back, and they're not assholes. we spent new years eve on adam and devons's trampoline with $60 worth of natural light. i put recover on when dan from recover came into the room and basically that's funny. everything felt like summer again for a little bit. went to a gay bar with jo and she got pissed cos i kept getting called beautiful. apparently im much like madonna. weird. she also got tips on how to not let me get away.

i think alot of people suck for trying to make people like them by ratting out other people. i had this big paragraph where i told people off for having blond ontop of brown for their hair, but i think you know you all look 12 so who cares. at least you have decorated myspaces and guys you i.m. and text message who realllyyyyy like you.

fay did coke, get over itCollapse )
9   ///FUCK IT

tomorrow im going to houston [06 Dec 2004|08:32pm]
saturday after work i sat at the bar and drank a "steaply discounted" beer. then emily sat next to me & we talked about having aquaintences not friends, & how shitty timmy is. then i got a piece of pizza at congress & 7th which required me to parallel park for the first time. it went very well. then i took lola to the dog park where she ran outside the fence to chase the dogs rather than just going inside the open gate, & everyone laughed at her. then i picked up keith who was already really drunk. then we went to veronica's party where people like trey and judson wouldnt walk to the front door with me, but people like travis would hand out candy with me. even if he constantly pulled out the strawberry flavor as if it was the first time and told me to try it. even though i was already eating one. how bout that moonwalk!

ps. judson is not a little kid, don't treat him like one. he gets pissed.
13   ///FUCK IT

[30 Nov 2004|08:48pm]
i think if i talked like this: "u idiet, w tee ef! baby bonerz & snacks!" i'd be more popular. but maybe not because it doesn't work 4 evry1, joanna. my journal entries should just be gibberish from now on and make sense to no one except me when i'm hyper. and maybe one other person who understands because everything is just quotes from adventures we've had. i think that's better than sex in the ass on film. and i think the fact that that doesn't really fit into what i was saying, but was in a way an inside joke, made me a little bit more .. cool.
16   ///FUCK IT

[14 Nov 2004|08:34pm]
a few days ago a stupid student doctor or some shit like that numbed me everywhere but where she jammed the scapel in about 5 times even after asking me if it hurt and me saying yes. then the doctor came in and started cutting and asked if it hurt and i said yes so he finally numbed me. that cost me about $200 or so.

next time ill talk about drugs & inside jokes, or i'll tell you a story involing joel, 1st thursday, and a creepy old guy with 5 bucks ...
6   ///FUCK IT

[05 Nov 2004|10:55pm]
i hate when people come into work just to get change for the meters. because we definately have an endless supply of quarters for dumbasses who go downtown unprepared. the only person i do that for is the cute gay guy from boyz cellar who tips. and is it really the end of the world if you get a to go cup but are drinking it for here? the only customers i like are small ice coffee to go then im going to the smoke shop, and ben's large coffee/large ice coffee with soy.

this girl said to me "i thought we should finally meet." as if ive been wanting to meet you. uh..we already established our situation on the phone when you tried to lower my self esteem and tell me im boring, dumb & a shitty girlfriend. illfucking knife y0u. you have a crator face and were wearing 80's earrings im pretty sure. wtf is going on with girls. like when the ones at work talk about sleeping over at guys houses who have girlfriends which you know they have because they talk about them when they come in to get mochas.

i got an old volvo & it came with a pavement tape in the glove box.
16   ///FUCK IT

[22 Oct 2004|08:29pm]
you know just because you talk shit on some dumbass girl or some kid doesn't necessarily make you better than them. alot of people think that. strange. like this guy sucks alot. but i don't talk about that all day. i just post in my livejournal so more people see it than who i talk to in real life. get it?

this is my brother's new girlfriend: meghanthropy. but you know, if it goes bad they are making a new pill that helps you forget painful or traumatic memories. i.e. eternal bullshit of the spotfree mind. join a study! ppd!
11   ///FUCK IT

[11 Oct 2004|10:18pm]

blacken party crew . com !
kevin troyer helped my mom move in and she lives down the street from bd. betty dunkerly. they're good friends. lola played with a dog named cooper today. that dog needed a good haircut. keith and i stayed in a hotel and my mom bought us lots of food and we watched TWO vince vaugh/ben stiller/will ferrel movies. talia where'd you go!!
9   ///FUCK IT

[03 Oct 2004|04:15pm]
i auditioned for a Dove advert featuring energetic women who are proud of their bodies for a chance to get $2000. did i make it? you tell me. which reminds me of how much i like a bottle of wine and a good issue of Marie Claire on the weekends. and strawberry bubble baths. a guy asked me what time it was at work but before i could say "5:51" he went "Beer:30!" and ran to the bar. The next day we "cleaned the store," i.e. ate pizza and drank beer. dr. mouw prescribed me 12 vicodin after i slammed my finger in the fridge and it's been heaven ever since...
7   ///FUCK IT

[24 Sep 2004|11:16pm]
i'm sick of hearing your voice talk about the things your mind worries about. how about i tell you how ugly i am and you can tell me how pretty you are. then you can put an internet heart at the end & pretend all the boys want you because you look just like all the other girls.

get the fuck out of here.
where is colt woody when you need his money.
4   ///FUCK IT

[09 Sep 2004|07:37pm]
i was remembering all these shitty things people i know have done. and i think i want to puke all day long when i think of them.

one time this girl named "kteen" told me this: "you know you've been secretly wanting to be me since you were about 15... which was like when? last year? at least i know how to treat a man right! liquor and non-perishables!" then she told me to never give her the "stink eye" again.

[29 Aug 2004|05:45pm]
politics in latin means "many bloodsucking creatures." and if pro is the opposite of con, is congress the opposite of progress??
15   ///FUCK IT

[20 Aug 2004|08:20pm]
i was supposed to tell you that houston keeps getting fatter and austin keeps getting skinnier. im also supposed to say it's because of the drugs. whatever. i get $30 in tips for giving you coffee & beer, i could buy a 20 sack a day if i wanted.

i found a zz top record on the sidewalk.
keep it real guys.

moreCollapse )
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[14 Aug 2004|09:30pm]
lola was found! other than that my temporary tattoo has been thought to be a real tattoo about 5 times. actually just twice. other than that i wish people didn't act so sketch and fishy. and abandoning people when they need you the most is still really cool. so is commenting to your own entries. wtf. i want my $500.
7   ///FUCK IT

[08 Aug 2004|10:06pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

i drove to houston with adam and devon.
then i came home because lola(my puppy) is lost.
the end!

14   ///FUCK IT

[26 Jul 2004|06:50pm]
addem royee's birthday party bash thursday. 211a lessin ln. bring gifts. plus some shows.. rosa and the philosophers/video screams. this is the lessin ln calendar for the rest of the month. also i got a job at the halcyon coffee shop across from the boyzcellar. so when you're done not being gay but going to a gay club you can stop by.
4   ///FUCK IT

[17 Jul 2004|09:39pm]
today i ate lunch with my mom and went with adam to see keith. i came home and found a cassette in the freezer that said thanks for the awesome.
you're welcomeCollapse )
6   ///FUCK IT

[06 Jun 2004|03:47pm]
we left cleo a voicemail and it ended at exactly 420. i think redman is trying to do nadia right now. gross! we got 10 people on the bus yesterday and were almost kicked off. i wish talia lived here. and that clark would date amber already. ha! that's good. joanna is backkkk and there is another party the 12th. 211a lessin ln. mike cooks mexican food every time he and jamie stay over. sorry if you have fleas. i don't think rebounds are cool. vicki is in the same room and i am iming her. you've heard that before i bet. i wonder how tankgirl is holding up ..
19   ///FUCK IT

be scene, but not heard [19 May 2004|11:45pm]
keith... is amazing.. adam is over drinking and watching video's. i love talking to homosexuals on my aim!!! woo hoo.. keith talks to lesbian.. keith just put peanut butter on my titties and said.. jeelly needs to be on that shit! wtf is he thinking. he is sooooo god damn cute. im tired and might go to bed soon. hey... i love keith.. is that wierd??? god i guess we ar going to move in together.. tator tots!!!! brb................ok back. im vegan and i love meat sausage! wait... im not a slut! kith is drunk on my computer... fuck him. i love to kiss him. on the lips!!! love is in the air, and i need the h2o!!!! woo hoo. damn. night stpid bitches on keiths buddy list! hahaha dis fag!


p.s. joannahahaha i love you. come back and dry hump me!!!

psps fuck keith he deleted comments n stuff>W<E" &wrote this entry
8   ///FUCK IT

[18 May 2004|03:03pm]
ok so .. im going to talk shit about you and you wont know it, but then when you talk to me & suck up & stuff i'll probably realize how much cooler i would be if you were my friend so i'll stop talking shit & i'll think you're nice. deal? and i'm going to call you a slut for no reason so i hope that's ok. also, im going to take a camera w/me everywhere, & you're going to take pictures of me with people. fuck it! i'll take the goddamn pictures of myself with cool people if i have to. and we're going to look straight at the camera & do absolutely nothing interesting.

ps. keith deleted some comments from this 'cos he's insane.
16   ///FUCK IT

[11 May 2004|04:27pm]
one time the scholtozsye's catering van picked me up at the bus stop on accident & drove me to work., then my manager tried to sell victoria and i his janet jackson cd. if you buy a mocha frappe & a cookie your total will be 420. i wish rusty would stop waking me up & asking to watch lifetime movies with me. jkj/k. keith takes body shots off adam & roy's asses sometimes. sometimes. jo & rusty are the cutest couple of my lifetime. i guess. anddddddd victoria and i almost drank wine at work. almost.

i guess it's summer since adam stu keith and kevin attacked me with water balloons. other than that i wish i was someone else....
20   ///FUCK IT

[05 May 2004|04:04pm]
i saw a skinhead & a mexican lesbian w/kkk & swastika tattoos on the bus. i felt odd since my tattoo is technically nazi related. she also had vans & a tattoo of frogs jumping off lily pads on her. and there was definately a black man on the bus. also, i miss my old thug neighbors who used to "flow" and let us walk into their apartment without knocking to get alcohol & weed. today i told my manager he disgusted me and he said "giiiiiiiirl" and started laughing. he's black. hey! the only thing keith ever does ever is go to myspace.com to flirt so i put a password on my computer. ha!
48   ///FUCK IT

[01 May 2004|06:00pm]
rusty and i watched the best liftime movie of my lifetime, basically. brook shields was a lesbian mother. and her partner died. and the grandparents tried to take heather. they lived in a retirement home!? wtf were they thinking. anyways. then people came and got drunk and put on black porn and some girl in a wife beater obviously wants/got ..youknowwho. shitty. -haybait.
22   ///FUCK IT

[26 Apr 2004|08:05pm]
perhaps at one point this thing where all i like to do is sleep will pass. meanwhile, im rather happy waking up and for some reason being half way blind for up to 30 minutes afterwards. everytime. it's about as interesting as not giving the creepy new guy tips at work because he touches me funny and talks about how days like this make him glad to be alive. your creepiness makes me want to shoot you. i think ginni from around the block just might suck some dick in around 2 weeks. and i think it just might be ry's. other than that i need somewhere to store 400 records.

judson and keith cuddlingCollapse )
20   ///FUCK IT

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